Imagine you’ve been forced to attend a party where you don’t know anyone, you don’t know the language that everyone’s speaking, the music they’re playing is unfamiliar, the food is unremarkable, and the whole place just smells funny.
Now imagine that these people you’ve just met keep coming up to you and trying to pat you on the head. You flinch every time. Geez, you barely know these people! You duck away, looking for a place to hide until they stop reaching for you.
This is how your new shy cat feels in your unfamiliar home. What cat in its right mind would want to be petted under those circumstances?!?
A cat needs to feel in control, comfortable, and secure before they will allow themselves to be touched. (Me too, right?) Here’s what you can do to help your shy cat achieve these goals and thus become more pettable.
- Choose a quiet time when your kitty seems relaxed.
- Try approaching them sideways. I mean, don’t face your shy cat straight on but sidle up to them slowly with your hand outstretched. Coming at them full frontal can make them think you’re about to grab them. Avoid staring into their eyes–look at them, but then look down. Be silent or speak softly.
- Hold out your hand, palm up, making sure they see your hand before slowly moving it toward them. Avoid coming at any cat overhanded, with your hand above their head—instead, bring it in under their chin, stopping about one or two inches away. (Pro tip: Before you try this, make sure your hands don’t smell of citrus or some other smell cats hate.)
- If they haven’t run away yet, let your kitty sniff your fingers. Keep your hand there until they’ve completed their inspection. (Pro tip 2: Pay attention to what your other hand is doing–because you can be sure your shy cat is. Make sure it’s not moving or doing something else that might seem … well, underhanded, i.e., threatening!) Then continue to keep your hand there and, wait. If you passed their sniff test, they may push their cheek against your hand. This is your invitation to pet your cat–a little. Congratulations! You won over your shy cat!
- If this doesn’t play out as desired, don’t despair. Try again later, maybe with a couple yummy-smelling treats in your hand next time as bait.
Be patient and keep trying. Your kitty just needs some time to feel at home at this strange party you’ve brought them to. Let them say when.
Shy Cats 